Letters from the Dock

Living on Credit

We made it to Alaska. I felt deeply happy for about four hours. Then the feeling stopped. On arrival, exhaustion, and settling the debts contracted during a long offshore passage.

Jean Peccoud

02 Jul 2026 • 2 min read

Adak at the Expedition Dock on Discovery Island in central Dutch Harbor.

We made it to Dutch Harbor on June 29th.

Ninety-six days from closing on the boat to landfall in Alaska. Forty-five days of refit. Six weeks of passage. On paper, something to be proud of.

I felt happy setting foot on land. Deeply happy — rarely in my life like that. It lasted about four hours.

Then relief. Relief from everything that could have gone wrong. The vigilance hasn't let go yet, and the fear hasn't either. We still have 1,500 miles before the boat reaches a place where she can get the attention she needs. The questions, the uncertainty, the what-ifs — I did not leave them behind in the ocean, I still carry them..

There's no energy left for celebrating. There's barely energy left for sleeping.

So instead: trying to forget the boat for a minute. Trying to get on top of the to-do list. Catching up on email. Figuring out which invoice I forgot to pay. What blog posts to write, which comments I have left unanswered, what video I should shoot.

I want to walk. Climb a few of the hills around Dutch Harbor. With a hundred meters, Bunker Hill was a nice leg shakedown after weeks of dormancy. I set my eyes on Pyramid Peak, a little more ambitious with six hundred meters. My head can see the path up, but the rest of my body can't.

More than anything, I want to run. But putting on my running shoes does not feel comforting. It feels overwhelming, like I would be running for the first time.

Three months of living on credit. The refit and the passage took a toll. I paid with plastic. The credit line is maxed out, and the bills are due.

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